OK, it has really been a while since I posted. I knew it had been a bit, but didn't realize I was nearing a year...this year has really flown by. It has been mostly me stressing (which is normal), a lot of "blah" and mundane everyday stuff (which, too, is normal) and a little bit of new stuff that I just haven't really felt the need or desire to share.
Well, I guess the first "OBVIOUS" place to go is that I am really bad at writing to people, even an audience but I have actually pulled way back on posting on media sites as well. Some of that is me being guarded and trying to keep some sort of anonymity, especially for my wee one, but also I am just not that exciting. I really am quite boring. Each day is pretty much the same cycle of us just living. playing and learning. My little is learning new stuff all the time, but mainly my learning seems to be learning what new thing my babe has discovered. New words, new interests and new abilities.
It somewhat saddens me that I have failed to keep up with this blog like I had originally planned, but I am a very quiet and secretive person so I guess I should expect that even blogging as an "unknown" still makes me feel vulnerable. I have intense social anxiety, and I am not really sure where it originates from, but in High School and for some time afterwords, I remember feeling [....] with so much certainty. I seemed to move past it and gain some social confidence but it has gone now and I am back to [....]
I know it is all in my head, I mean, in my head I know it is just my head over thinking situations, but in my heart, I just cannot handle it. To be honest, I think the state of the world has something to do with it as well. The news is scary and sad so much of the time, and I was just thinking earlier that I think this world needs a news station that only airs (and prints as it would be) the "happy" and "feel-good" human interest stories. There are so many local and national news stations that are always on top of all news stories, good or bad, and if that is the kind of news you want, it would still be there. But sometimes I think everyone would like a break from the sad and scary reality of our world and to sit down and focus on inspiring news stories. To devote a whole news show, or channel even, to stuff that would shine a light on helpful people and various acts of kindness, of people "paying it forward" and the stuff the "restores faith in humanity". The uplifting stuff that gets cast in the shadow of shootings, rapes, kidnappings, violence and drugs. These news stories are in the news papers and magazines, in our email our Facebook and Twitter feeds, conversations with friends and/or co-workers. We are constantly bombarded with the negative that it is hard to remember the bright spots, let alone shine them for all to see.